Please don’t close the shades and dim the lights once you realize my article is on the topic of vulnerability.  We’re going to journey through this one together. It’s time to shed a light on the truth about vulnerability and what we’re missing out on. We all want to feel a sense of joy, happiness and belonging, but it is unattainable without risking sadness, heartache and disconnectedness. If building walls around yourself is your first line of defense against risks, you’ve blocked any chance of the benefits of living a life in whole-heartedness.

There is nothing weak about practicing vulnerability.  It takes strength being honest with yourself and embracing your most fragile imperfections and fears.  Self-acceptance is the foundation on which all other relationships must be built to survive.  Bestselling author Brene’ Brown writes, “The truth is: Belonging starts with self-acceptance.  Your level of belonging, in fact, can never be greater than your level of self-acceptance, because believing that you’re enough is what gives you the courage to be authentic, vulnerable and imperfect. Talk to yourself like you would to someone you love; otherwise, you’ll either walk inside your story and own it or you’ll stand outside your story and hustle for your worthiness.”

Perfection does not exist!  Creating a separate persona of yourself in an attempt to please others is nothing more than an illusion of a false self which is far more time consuming and fragile than simply acknowledging and embracing your own vulnerabilities.  According to Brown, there are two sides to the vulnerability coin: there’s the risks of fear and shame on one side, but on the other side rests the birthplace of belonging and love. 

Imagine what the world would look like for children if we emphasized their worthiness and acceptance of their imperfections rather than peddling an ideal world filled with princes and princesses.


– Karen Restivo is a Life & Communication Coach and owner of SerenityMatagorda Isle. You can learn more about Karen by visiting her online at or emailing her at

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